2004 BC...Before Children

So, it is quiet in my house. I am caught up on my housework (or at least as caught up as I am going to get tonight). There is nothing on TV. The girls are asleep, and Michael is at work. I'm a little bit at a loss. I don't have these moments often, and I'm not quiet sure what to do wtih myself. This has gotten me thinking about my life BC...Before Children. What in the world did I do with my time? Yes, I had a full-time job, and yes, we went out more. But, still, I was home a lot with relatively little cleaning and laundry to do. So, what did I do with myself? I honestly can't really remember...it seems like ages ago.

Which leads me to my next thought....one of these days I will have that again...relatively little housework and laundry, only 2 people to prepare meals for, etc. Sometimes in the middle of the day when my girls are about to pull each other's hair out, and I'm about to pull MY hair out I think of that day to come and think to myself how wonderful the quiet will be. And then a little hand finds it's way into my hand, a little voice says, "I love my mommy," a little set of arms wraps itself around my neck and squeezes as tight as they can, 4 beautiful eyes look at me with all of the innocence in the world and suddenly the quiet isn't quite as appealing to me. Each day, my sweet girls take one more step towards their independence which brings out a fierce pride in my heart along with a gentle but sharp tug that can sometimes almost take my breath away. It's not always going to be like this, and I know I will miss it. I already sometimes miss getting Gracie dressed, looking for lost binkies for Michaela because I know she won't go to sleep without it, the 2 AM feedings, the phases where only their mommy would satisfy...

As mothers, we try to soak it all in but we lose that in the face of tantrums, defiance, disobedience, and sheer exhaustion. This year, I am soaking it in...every minute of it...the exhausting, frustrating, infuriating moments right along with the sweetest most precious moments.

Frustrating moment to remember from today: Michaela and the darn bowl of Clementines on our kitchen counter. The girl is obsessed with them. 15 minutes before lunch was ready, she was trying her hardest to be sneaky and get one of those Clementines, of which she had already had at least 4 that morning. I told her to wait until lunch, but she was having none of it...she wrinkled up her little nose at me, wiggled her little hips, and stuck her tongue out at me! Frustrating for sure, but adorable all of the same time. Those little hips can move when she gets defiant!!!

Precious moment to remember from today: Cuddling on Michaela's bed with Michaela tucked under one arm and Gracie tucked under the other leaning back on pillows and snuggling under the blankets. Michaela wiggled as close as she could to me saying, "Brrr!" Gracie picked out The Beauty and The Beast book (of course, as she is obsessed with princesses). Fifteen minutes of sweetness wonderfulness happiness joyfulness and thankfulness all wrapped up into one wonderful moment.